I know, I know, I fucking know. I remember that tense feeling, somewhere between shit-yourself anxiety and stroke-inducing rage, of wondering what deliberate, fuck-up-your-day provocation Donald Trump had tweeted. Of course, if you’re of a devolved or brain-damaged or cynical mindset, you looked forward to the Trump tweets like they were worms disgorged from Daddy Bird’s beak into your hungry, squawking throats. And then the rest of us would get extra rage jolts from the idea that all the greedy-mouthed baby birds were loving this whole situation.
So I’m not here to tell you that Donald Trump should be allowed back on Twitter because of free speech or censorship or whatever. Twitter is not a government entity. Trump wasn’t banned for being conservative. He was banned for being a lying dick. His First Amendment rights weren’t violated. No one is passing a law saying he should be punished for being a lying dick. He’s free to be a lying dick in lots of places, and, well, he totally is. So, no, I don’t actually give a fuck about Trump being banned. I’ve been tossed from shitty bars for being less of a dick and I wasn’t a whiny bitch about it. I just figured it was the bar owner’s prerogative and went to the next bar.