- The voters of Florida – Allen West is not in Congress anymore. Alan Grayson is.
- The voters of Wisconsin – You elected the first openly gay United States Senator in Tammy Baldwin, and you spanked Paul “Eddie Munster” Ryan for throwing a tantrum about the auto-plant closure in Janesville, which he falsely blamed on President Obama. Eddie didn’t even carry his hometown of Janesville after that big lie. You sent him to his room without any supper—and happily, that room is not in the Vice President’s house.
- The voters of Illinois – You sent a genuine war hero, double-amputee Tammy Duckworth to the United States House of Representatives, replacing the Tea Party’s own deadbeat dad, Joe Walsh (definitely not the Eagle).
- The voters of Maine, Minnesota, Maryland, and Washington—You affirmed marriage equality at the ballot box for the first time in any state’s history. I’m particularly grateful to Minnesota for making Marcus Bachmann cry.
- The voters of Colorado and Washington – Like, wow. Totally!
- The United States of America – You re-elected a great President, Barack Obama. This was no small feat, since Ann Romney had already sent a moving van to the White House to pack up all of his things. There’s a lot of blame going around about why Mittens lost. Mama doesn’t choose to play. Unlike the whiners at Fox News, Mama believes there were no losers here. Only one winner: USA! USA! USA!
And, finally, Mama is deeply thankful for all the Progressive Radio listeners in Portland. You’ve been incredibly loyal and supportive to KPOJ. Mama is incredibly grateful to each and every one of you, and I promise you, starting with the Stephanie Miller iPhone and IPad apps, which are being released today, and The Progressive Voices channel onTuneIn which starts next week, you’ll not miss out on a single senator or fart joke until Mama has sipped her last Chardonnay.